How to Lose a Girl in One Date
Some fun stories from a friend of dates gone wrong
I recently talked with a close friend about dates that she’d been on that went totally wrong, and thought I’d share in case you happen to be on a date with someone and don’t get a call back! You might fall into one of these categories, starting with:
Angry Runner Guy
This was a running date: meet up somewhere and go for a run. Definitely a weird fit people thing to do on a first date. (What happened to coffee?) It was also warm and dry, not the best if you want to talk between all the huffing and puffing.
He was a good looking (as my friend said, “pretty”), and fairly in shape fella.
So the run is going fine, but at some point during the run, my friend says something to the guy and he gets mad.
At the drop of a hat, angry runner man says something indecipherable and takes off, leaving my friend in the dust. She had no idea what it could have been, but there he went. Date over. The run wasn’t even over yet, and no explanation.
Abandonment and anger, not great first date feelings.
The worst part of this story is that this was a blind date set up for my friend, so when asked later how the blind date went…
“Not great...”
And the person who set up the blind date asked angry runner guy to call my friend and apologize. Just another sprinkling of cringe on top the awkwardness.
Bottom line: If someone makes you mad, it’s better to talk it out than to fume and (literally) run away. Even
Stalker Spy Guy
To set the scene, this is in the days before Ring cameras and the normal surveillance state. He had one of those security cameras not just on his house, but IN his house.
Anyway, we’re getting ahead of things.
When my friend went out to bars, stalker guy would simply appear behind her. She’s pretty jumpy so that wasn’t all that great of an experience.
And when they left to go somewhere else, sure enough, he’d be there, quipping “Here I am!” as he once again popped up behind her.
He also apparently had worked for a 3 letter agency AND had met the president (which he had a photo to prove). Explains the cameras maybe?
So stalker guy asks for a date, where he cooks a meal and invites my friend to his house.
My friend, meanwhile, has her phone out to call another friend (who pushed her onto the date). Stalker guy calls her out at one point “why are you looking at your phone so much, are you worried I’m going to do something to you?”
Gulp.
Bottom line: People don’t like being spied on. Or stalked. Don’t be creepy. Ew.
Boring Cyclist
When he opened his mouth it was, simply put, boring. He also loved going around on his bike, which was pretty common where my friend lived. He also showed up to this first date on his bike (hey at least he’s committed).
During the date, he simply sat there and didn’t say anything. Desparate to make conversation, my friend almost choked to death while trying to speak through the awkwardness while eating, and went and hid in the bathroom to recover after coughing for 5–10 minutes.
After that great bit of awkwardness, they ended up going back to his place to watch a movie, because boring guy couldn’t think of something more interesting to do.
Borrinnggg
Bottom Line: If you want someone to be interested in you, you have to be interesting.
To Sum it Up
Don’t be angry, creepy or boring. You won’t get past the first date!
